In Heaven and Hell - Chapter 19.

A lot of people don't exactly.. Know a lot about me.
Then again I don't really tell anyone.
My life contrasts in many ways.
One second is Heaven, the other is the equivalent of Hell.
You know something's wrong when you gotta fake yourself with your boyfriend.
Well anyways, let's get on with the story.

Last night I was told by my darling mother that once I turn eighteen and graduate from high school, I am no longer welcome under her roof. So I am being kicked out of my own house once I graduate. This is.. Lovely.

Secondly, my mother seems to believe if I were to have a spare period during school hours, I would not like I had planned, sit in the library and get a jump start on homework, but become a hooker, druggie, drug-dealer, steal from stores, cut myself, become an alcoholic, pop pills, and drink+pop pills to try and commit suicide.
What a darling way for a parent to think of their child and tell them.

She also proceeds to tell me that I'm pretty much a failure, and tells her friends I'm the problem child. Also that I am "verbally abusive" to her, whilst the most I've ever insulted her is saying she was paranoid about me cutting myself and such.

My best friend told me that I lost my smile.
I'm to.. Out of it to cheer my boyfriend up and make him happy.
I can barely be happy or smile anymore.
Can barely laugh.

I play the happy-happy big/lil sis. But for once I can't do my job. Sometimes even I need a little help.. Oh well. Life goes on.

I'll write about Heaven one day. But that's my personal dream world where everything works out. Where everyone's happy and fine.

I'll live. I'll survive on my own all over again.
I can beat this.
Just don't give into temptation.


Ugh.. My nightmares started again..

No comments:

Copyright @ Just Another Day | Floral Day theme designed by SimplyWP | Bloggerized by GirlyBlogger